Go on.

One step at a time,
Foward,
Even if I'm really scared of the future ahead,
Even if I'm really scared of the things around me now,
Even though I may break down into tears and cry,
Even if I'm already crying,

But I have to fight on.
Through school.
Through life.

Yes.
She is fighting too.
So am I.
I'm not brave or strong. Neither am I smart. Nor am I good with socializing with people.
But I will go on.

Rienx's rambles

Yes, I did something stupid again.
Yes, it was my fault that I hit my sister first.
Yes, I'm the one that has to apologise first for every real conflict I get into, as usual.
Yes yes yes, I'm not nice to talk to, I'm hard to approach, I turn people away, I'm ugly, and I rarely talk.
God knows why was I even born.
It's times like this that makes me wish that I wasn't born at all.
Yes, then I'm being insensitive to the millions of babies who died in their mothers' wombs before they even had a chance to see the world.
Okay, so I apologised.
Yet you're still so bitter with me.
Fine.
I can't do anything anymore.

Anyway, I have more important things to worry about. The world doesn't revolve around you.
I am pretty, pretty certain that my random heart palpitations are caused by stress and anxiety that I'm feeling.
Maybe I'm just feeling a bit more stress and anxiety than usual that causes my heart to have irregular rythm.
Yes, that's it.
 Nothing more.

 Nothing more.

 If not, fate decided that maybe it actually doesn't really need me in this world at all, so it decided that it will kill me with some random, sudden heart attack or something.
But I never inherited nor developed any heart condition(although my mother has a history of heart condition when she was young), and I think I never did until now.
So these heart palpitations must be due to stress.
Yes.
Nothing more.

Nothing more.

And now I just want to sleep and forget everything that's happened today.
I want to wake up and go to school tomorrow(Even if I don't want to) and forget everything that happened yesterday.
I want to forget about the fight with my sister.
I want to forget about my heart.
I want to concentrate in school and distract me from all the bitter things that I'm feeling now...

School starts!(Like yesterday HAHAHA)

I KNOW MY LAST POST WAS THREE DAYS AGO AND I KNOW I SAID I WILL POST PICTURES OF MY RIVER SAFARI VISIT.
BUT I'VE BEEN FEELING VERY LAZY TO POST PICTURES AND I'VE BEEN BUSY TRYING TO MAKE PIANO COVERS FOR MY CHANNEL BEFORE SCHOOL STARTS.

JUST WAIT.

I'm making a note here first listing who my subscribers are so I don't forget, because some of them keep their subscriptions private and I want to know who all my subscribers are.

(In order of who subscribes first etc.)

1. Huda
2. Yeo
3. Elisa
4. Ruby(Joel) RS (I don't have his youtube channel account currently.)
5. Hui Wen
6. Tuvi
7 and 8. My parents. (Aha, they like to listen to my piano covers. ^^)
9. Edwina
10.Angelo RS (Also don't know his youtube channel account)
11.Unknown subscriber. (Probably another one of my friends.)
Yeps, 11 subscribers! All are my nice friends who subscribed to me and support me HAHAHA XD. Well, my channel is still relatively small and new so not many people out of my circle of friends view my videos, let alone subscribe HAHAHA because my channel only has 5 piano covers so far. @_@
My fourth piano cover:
And my fifth and current piano cover: Though, I will continue making piano covers as and when I can, of course.~
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~
Okay okay, enough about my youtube channel.
First about today--
We have a new classmate!
It's a guy. XD
He's a foward student, meaning he is repeating a particular module, so he is like a partial classmate? Because his timetable is different from us. Some classes he will join us, other classes he will not. @_@
But nevertheless, now our class has 10 guys and 10 girls. Equal. XD
Today we have a one hour lesson only. We met our personal tutor(like a form teacher for our class), a lady named Ms Lai.
She's our financial accounting management(FAM) tutor too.
We also decided our new class rep, assistant class rep and treasurer.
I wasn't any one of them haha.
After that one hour tutorial, I went with my friends to buy our new FAM textbook(which costs a little over $30 @_@), then I ran all the way back up slope to the hilltop library carpark, where my father came with my mother, my sister and her bf to bring all of us down to the hospital.
My mother has another scanning to do today. She's going to have her womb and uterus scanned.
It's like she's going for regular checkups for her new baby HAHAHA.
I'll be like "Hey guys!(to my friends) I'm gonna have a new younger sibling! She/he's 18 years younger than me!! :DD"
NO WAY I want a sibling 18 years apart from me. @_@
So anyway, her appointment was supposed to be at 4.30pm, but we waited for more than 1 hour before the doctor called her in.
After that, we still have to wait for her to go into the consultation room.
Fortunately the results all showed that she's fine. The bleeding she still has every month is also normal. Well, it's not really normal, it's abnormal, but it's still normal.
The doctor says that she's still considerably young because she's still below 55 yrs old, so a little bleeding here and there is nothing to worry about.
The doctor even commented how healthy my mother was. (Because she exercised everyday and ate lots of fruits and vegetables). That's just how hardworking my mother is.
So yeah, nothing to worry about.
Time to move on.~
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~
Fine.
Since I have some time now, (and there is no school tomorrow because tutorials are cancelled because lectures haven't started yet XD)
I guess I shall go edit my river safari post and post pictures there. XD

River safari!!

So I decided to write a blog post while waiting for the second episode of mekakucity actors to air.
I'm in the nico livestream now, and it's going to air in about like, 25 minutes time as I write, but I don't know if I'm going to get kicked out again like last week because there's too many people and I don't have premium membership so obviously I don't have a priority seat in there so.
Anyway, if I get kicked out, then too bad. XD

But I feel REALLY LAZY to blog now. I took a LOT of photos, my father too, and I combined them and post it all in an album on facebook.
So I'll only post the ones I posted on instagram because I combined them, and I'll post a few other photos that I want to show here.
TOMORROW.
I'm too sleepy and lazy now.
And too excited for the second episode. XD

But today was a lot of fun!
Even though it was really really warm and we didn't see any capybaras unlike what was promised in the map.
We saw the pandas, and we saw various other animals.
I took several videos too which I will upload tomorrow. If I'm successful.

But it was a fun day.
It's a pity my sister didn't go in the end. She's too tired, working night shifts consecutively, so the family is incomplete.
Anyway we didn't see any capybaras so it wasn't too disappointing for her. (Capybaras are her favourite animals)

So I'll blog more tomorrow! Too excited for the episode to come out. >.< Hahahaha!

Good Friday

Before I start to write this post...

I just read finished up to the latest chapters of the korean webtoon Crepuscule, a story about how a young pureblood vampire named Setz brings his friend who is a year younger than him, a human boy named Lark, into the vampire world after Lark is about to be sent to the orphanage. A very interesting story with the plot deepening as the chapters goes by, filled with action, supernatural and fighting.

WHY DON'T THIS COMIC HAVE A DAMN ANIME?!?!

Every time the plot thickens(and it deepens a lot of times, trust me), I'll be like: "Ohhh ohhhhh, THE PLOT INTENSIFIES."(says it in a dramatic way) HAHAHAHA

I wish that Setz will act a bit more vampire-like, thirsts for Lark's human blood, push him against the wall or even a bed and bites into his neck and slowly drinks his blood..AHH *bangs head*

WHAT AM I THINKING.

OF COURSE IT'S NOT HAPPENING.

Nooooooooo

Okay moving on.

I haven't been able to record any piano covers today. Not having much time to do so is one thing. (I usually strictly record only when the house is empty to reduce the noises in the background. I even shut all the windows in the room now to minimize background noise).
The fact that I wanted to maintain the standards of my covers, made me redo my recordings a lot of times, gaah. My perfectionist complex is kicking in.
Today I originally intended to cover Bokurano(our) let it be, ayano's happiness theory and world is born. But I was unsuccessful.
These things will happen often, I guess. Making piano covers isn't easy at all.
Plus, school is starting next week. I think at most I'll only be able to upload a piano cover once a week if I'm not so busy.
Anyway, it's not like my channel is big or popular or has thousands of subscribers, let alone I don't know, it doesn't even have 5 subscribers yet, only 3 at the moment. XD
Plus the songs that I cover aren't very well known. I think people find my covers through the tags I added to my videos.
With all those facts in consideration, when somebody sent me a personal email on my youtube telling me how she "rated my cover 5/5", how excellent my cover is(just exaggeration ^^") and telling me I can get more comments, likes and subscribers by joining some website, I was tempted to, but I realized that I can't keep this up with school starting next week.
This year is going to be a tough one, they say.
*Sigh* So my channel is not going to be very active. It'll probably remain with only 3 subscribers for a very long time.

But hey, I'm doing something. I'm putting my ability to use and sharing it with others. I'm doing something. Instead of always playing the songs to myself.
My ability, which is common and yet not so common, is to be able to hear and recognise sounds by ear, and tell exactly what pitch it is, no matter what made it. It can be a piano, a violin, drum, whatever instrument, and even a doorbell or a car horn, or the calling of the birds in the morning. This ability is commonly known as the perfect pitch, or absolute pitch in the music world.
So I use my ability when I hear songs, and my brain instantly matches the sounds with the pitches I recognise automatically, and I am able to play the songs on the piano. I've been doing this ever since a young age,(I have straight As for all of my music hearing tests) but I only started covering songs at the age of 12.

I finally felt like I've done something productive in the last week of my holidays. And I'm doing something that I love.
Making piano covers isn't easy, and I'm doing one extra step, which is hardsubbing the english translation into my covers. But that is because I want those who watch my covers to understand what the music is about, so they can really feel the music.
And I love what I do. I don't mind the extra work at all.
I realized, from this, that this is what it really means to do what you love to do. Even if there were hardly any people viewing my covers, I still feel dedicated to making as much piano covers as I can. But unfortunately I started too late. :(

But it is okay. As long as my love for the piano and music never dies, and I never lose my hearing ability(I hope I never will!), I will keep on making piano covers.~
~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~
Tomorrow my father's bringing the family to river safari! I hope the animals there are cute. And it's not too smelly. >< Haha!
Unfortunately my sister is not going. She's been working night shifts at the wards these few days, and she's dead tired. This morning after showering, she went straight to her bedroom, turned on the aircon, shut herself and locked the door and slept all the way until the late afternoon. Nursing is really tiring work.
And tonight she went out again to do another night shift.
And to think yesterday she still asks me if I want to watch Kuroshitsuji live action movie this coming weekend.
Don't push yourself if you're so tired, sister! :/

Okay that's all.~ Shall look foward to Mekakucity Actors episode 2 tomorrow. *w*

Ruirui continues working on her piano covers

On this warm thursday, I worked on and uploaded two more piano covers:
Mine, Yours:

Komorebi(Sunbeams filtering through the leaves):

This time it didn't take me very long to work on hardsubbing the text into the videos. One is because I'm getting used to it, and maybe the other is because there isn't much lyrics this time.

So that's all for now.~

Rienx starts a youtube channel?!

After posting another piano cover on my facebook and getting likes and positive feedback from my friends (well, actually only two friends commented but at least I got something!), I feel encouraged to post my cover on youtube!
And here it is!

My very first piano cover on my channel!
Well it's definitely not my first piano cover; I've been covering songs ever since I was in my first year of secondary school(middle school), which is like 5 years ago? Just that I never uploaded or recorded my covers because I was too lazy and back then I never thought of uploading them. I just played for fun. :/
But yeah anyway, yup! And I'm going to upload more as and when I can! (And when I'm not feeling too lazy, because I plan to add lyrics to my covers too haha~)
Somehow I feel just a little tiny bit productive today, because I spent the afternoon working on this video, learning from scratch and trying to fit the words nicely with the video. Ah.~
I planned to go swimming today with the nice weather and all(not sunny, just cloudy) but well, I can always go tomorrow.~

Okay that's all. Back to reading the manhwa Crepuscule.~